Decisions

They are coming tomorrow to do the 30 day inspection on the rental house that my mother and I share.   It is almost 1 year that we have lived together.   I was hoping to have a “home” of our own by this time but that does not look like feasible.

Decisions.

Some decisions are easy. Some people have better decision making faculties that others.  My decision making skills resemble a squirrel crossing the road.  I hate decision making.  I’m always afraid I’ll make the wrong one so I try to weigh the pros and cons and then make the decision that I am less fearful about.

This type of scattered brain activity can come after dealing with trauma.

The mind deals with trauma in different ways and one way is to avoid conflict.  I avoid conflict.  The move here was very stressful and expensive – I do not want to move again unless it’s into a place of security.

Funny,  God never promises us a place of security.  We make plans, we organize, we control and all of it is futile.

The Parable of the Rich Fool

13 Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.”

14 Jesus replied, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?” 15 Then he said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.”

16 And he told them this parable: “The ground of a certain rich man yielded an abundant harvest. 17 He thought to himself, ‘What shall I do? I have no place to store my crops.’

18 “Then he said, ‘This is what I’ll do. I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain. 19 And I’ll say to myself, “You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.”’

20 “But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’

21 “This is how it will be with whoever stores up things for themselves but is not rich toward God.”

Even if we think we’ve got it all figured out – we don’t have control.

I have a new mantra that I have developed over the last few years.  It’s not very spiritual but it sure has helped me to avoid making decisions based on fear….

“Do Not Panic”

This is what I tell myself when my brain starts to overload.  Mom and I  have prayed and asked God to help us with the decisions set before us and we have faith that He will.  So now, until He answers I will say………Do Not Panic.

If a decision is not made, the lease here will turn into a month by month….that is not such a bad idea.